Bye bye chemo
On Wednesday, assuming my blood levels are ok, I will be having my last chemo. Last chemo! I'm so relieved. I'm not sure I can stand much more of it, so it's a good job this is the last. It's been hard, and as I've said many times, I got through it because of amazing friends. I want to say thank you to the people who have stood by my side the whole time. I don't want to name names because I'm scared of missing someone out accidentally, so I will just hope that you know who you are. Like I said at the start of all this, I'm not a strong person, I'm not brave. I'm only still standing, just about, because of the strength of some incredible friends. (Oh gawd, as I am writing this I've started to cry! I'm too emotional, see? Not strong. New Year's Resolution: Toughen the fuck up.) I don't know what I'd do without you, and I love you very much.
I also want to say a specific big thank you and a big FUCK YEAH WE'VE (nearly) DONE IT! to the friends I've made who are also about to have their last chemo. I've had a lot of support from, and made a lot of friends, who have/have had breast cancer and are going through/have gone through cancer treatment. Massive big love to everyone.
So if my last chemo is this Wednesday, 3rd December, then I can expect to be ill for up to 8 or 9 days after. (I have no intention of being ill longer than that at the most cos I have people to see and places to be from 12th onwards). Seeing as it's December, I'm preparing for this last stint of chemo-induced houseboundness by putting up my Christmas decorations, and getting all my dvds of Christmas films out and ready. I hate that I'm going to be ill again, but at least I can make this one festive!
And then the celebrations begin, and I can't wait because I get to spend lots of time, not ill, with the people who matter to me most. A few of the highlights include:
- Fake Christmas Day at my house with Charlotte and Emily who have been my rocks over these last few months, so I cannot wait to spoil them rotten.
- Christmas night out with my favourite work peeps who have organised the date around my last chemo to make sure I can be there! So I will be there with (jingle) bells on.
- Despite having not read the book I'm planning on rocking up to my book club/beer club night in December to remind them who I am cos I've not been in so long.
- Leicester YBCN Christmas meet up
- Standard Christmas Food Orgy with The Girls (and their boys), another group of people who I need to spoil rotten for being so ace.
- Plus a bunch of other nights out using Christmas as an excuse for drinking cocktails and champagne and putting the world to rights with various friends.
When I think about all this I feel really happy. I'm glad I wrote this all down, it's a good reminder.
Anyway.... now to just prepare for LAST CHEMO! My milking the "I've got cancer" thing has paid off as I have a friend coming round with homemade crumble shortly, then I've got a mad busy afternoon/evening sorting shit out and christmassing my house, work tomorrow in the day, tomorrow evening will be spent telling Emily how brilliant she is while she makes me cosmopolitans, work Tuesday in the day, and then out celebrating last chemo in town with Amy Jay on Tuesday night.
Then bring on Wednesday. Bring it on.